Oates05 Jul 2010 02:27 pm

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Forks, WA - Daryl Hall, the bare lipped, barely beloved albatross of the legendary pop duo Hall and Oates, has signed on to join Team Edward in the final installment of the hugely popular teen and tween sparkly Mormon vampire series.

Hall, 67, who was last objectified by teen girls as a piece of blue-eyed soul man meat over three decades ago, freely admits he is no fan of the vampire genre.

“Man, I’m just tired of playing casinos and podunk county fairs”, says Hall. “This sanitized bloodless crap would have Bela Lugosi spinning in his grave. But hey, if this god awful schlock can help me score a few fang banging chicks and pay off my gambling bets, I say why the hell not?”

Hall hopes the upcoming Twilight appearance will reverse his humiliating, Rick Springfieldesque, thirty year fall from cultural relevance. “I leave an unanswered message on Dick Clark’s machine every year”, explains the Philadelphia born crooner. “America seems perfectly content to rock in her New Years without us.”

Hall, along with his partner John Oates, can be seen performing at this year’s Puyallup Fair on September 22nd.

Twilight Maneater is scheduled to begin filming in early 2011.

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